Using both donor eggs and donor sperm, what about genetic explanations?

Hello, I’m 38.

I’ve been TTC for over 3 years unsuccessfully… First time I got pregnant three times, but I lost my baby when I was 8-10 weeks pregnant.

After that, I did an IVF cycle which resulted in failure because of poor sperm quality. We did then 3 IUI with donor sperm and my own eggs and I got pregnant but went through a chemical pregnancy.

Now, we haven’t thrown in the towel and have turned to double donor IVF, but I think the baby won’t feel like mine and I’m afraid about our parenting responsibility…

Anyone in this case too?

Dear michela34,

While it is true that the genes of the baby-to-be will not be yours, you should keep in mind that you will be the ones educating the child. For this reason, gestures such as facial expressions, ways of looking, walking and reacting, certain behaviors, etc. will be very similar to yours, which will make people say that he/she even takes after you.

Besides, you will be the one who gives birth, since even though the fusion between the egg and the sperm develops into an embryo, it has to attach to the uterus in order to be protected and fed; otherwise it cannot become a human being. What I mean to say is that you will indeed experience what is called “child-mother attachment” as in any natural pregnancy.

The experience of being on parenthood can turn out to be such a highly gratifying one.

Hope this helps,

Best wishes